Thursday, November 16, 2017

Brotherly Love versus Sibling Rivalry

Most years, the Haftara of Parashat Toledot is the opening chapter of the prophecies of Malachi, because of the verse [2] which states: “Was not Esau Jacob’s brother? Says God...,” however, this year, since Shabbat is the eve of Rosh Ḥodesh, the haftara is “Maḥar Ḥodesh” [I Samuel 20:14-42]
We can discern a connection between the content of our Parasha and that of the haftara, even if only by contrast.
Among the similarities :
Y Esau is instructed by Isaac to take his bow [Genesis 27:3], while Jonathan fires arrows [I Samuel 20:36-38
Y Each of these biblical stories involves a meal: Isaac instructs that a meal be prepared for him [27:4], and King Saul and his entourage partake of a festive meal in honor of Rosh Ḥodesh [20:24].
Y Each of the stories involves crying: “Esau raised his voice and began to weep” [27:38], while both David and Jonathan cried [20:41]
 Y In each chapter, there is a plot of two conspirators against the father: Rebecca and Jacob against Isaac and Jonathan and David against Saul
Y In each, one of the main characters decides to kill another: “Esau said to himself, 'The days of mourning for my father will be here soon. I will then be able to kill my brother Jacob.'” [27:41], and King Saul decided to execute David [20:30-32]. (And Saul apparently actually tried to kill Jonathan (20:33).)
Y In each of the stories there is a stark contrast: what is beneficial for one of the central characters is decidedly the opposite for another. Isaac informed his first born son: “you will serve your brother,” and Saul informed his eldest son [v. 31] “for all the days that the son of Jesse is alive, you and your kingdom cannot be established.”
The essential difference between the two biblical stories is the abyss of internecine hatred (even if it is not reciprocal, Esau feels and expresses his hatred of his younger twin), versus the lofty love between friends. Jonathan no doubt knew the truth of his father’s words, that as long as David lived, he Jonathan would not reign. Jonathan understood that David’s success meant that he could not ascend to the throne of Israel. Nonetheless, out of his deep love for David, Jonathan acted against his own interest.
This essential difference receives expression in the crying of Esau versus that of David and Jonathan. Esau cried for himself, for his loss of his father’s blessing to Jacob, while Jonathan cried for his beloved friend “because his father had put him to shame.” [v.34] David and Jonathan did not weep for themselves, rather “one for the other.” [v.41]
It is not by chance that our Sages [Pirkei Avot 5:16] cite David and Jonathan as the prime example of love which is independent of anything tangible.


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